Step one: buy a new cat litter pan and scooper. Wash both thoroughly. For more random things, see Andrea James: Shared Experiences http://www.andreajames.com/blog/index.php
Next, bake a 13x9 sheet cake. Or you can cheat like me and buy a sheet cake and put it in upside down. The uneven bottom is good, as you will see. For more random things, see Andrea James: Shared Experiences (http://www.andreajames.com/blog/index.php)
You will also need vanilla wafers, two containers of whipped frosting, Tootsie Rolls (accept no substitutes) and optional granulated blue or green sugar. For more random things, see Andrea James: Shared Experiences http://www.andreajames.com/blog/index.php
Crush all the vanilla wafers into cat-gravel-sized bits in a food processor or in a bag with a rolling pin. For more random things, see Andrea James: Shared Experiences http://www.andreajames.com/blog/index.php
I prefer a hammer for evenness. For more random things, see Andrea James: Shared Experiences http://www.andreajames.com/blog/index.php
Mix two-thirds of the crushed wafers and frosting until even. For more random things, see Andrea James: Shared Experiences http://www.andreajames.com/blog/index.php
Optional: add blue sugar to give it a grayish tinge. For more random things, see Andrea James: Shared Experiences http://www.andreajames.com/blog/index.php
Spread frosting mixture to cover top completely. Unevenness is fine. For more random things, see Andrea James: Shared Experiences http://www.andreajames.com/blog/index.php
Now we are ready to add remaining crushed wafers. For more random things, see Andrea James: Shared Experiences http://www.andreajames.com/blog/index.php
Sprinkle them evenly across surface, getting plenty in the corners and on the edges. For more random things, see Andrea James: Shared Experiences http://www.andreajames.com/blog/index.php
A little messiness and globs make it look better. For more random things, see Andrea James: Shared Experiences http://www.andreajames.com/blog/index.php
Next, carefully warm (don't melt) the Tootsie Rolls in the microwave. Taper them a bit on the ends, because if cat poop weren't tapered, their buttholes would slam shut after they doo-doo. Bury some of the poops and roll others around in the litter for a dramatic effect. Add a light coating of blue or green sugar to give the suggestion of the scent-masking crystals. For more random things, see Andrea James: Shared Experiences http://www.andreajames.com/blog/index.php
Stick the scooper in the middle for use as a serving device. Serves 18. For more random things, see Andrea James: Shared Experiences http://www.andreajames.com/blog/index.php
The perfect party gift for the host who has everything. For more random things, see Andrea James: Shared Experiences http://www.andreajames.com/blog/index.php
